Before I say anything, please let me emphasize this is in good humor. I fully invite you to mock show jumpers. I can take it.
You might be a hunter princess if
Your jumps are typically natural or painted white. They also have excessive shrubbery.
Your childhood shows consisted of giant bows and garters and paddock boots.
You wouldn’t be caught dead without your fake tail braided in.
You’ve shown in the big blue oval.
Shawty gets long and low.
Lol, what’s an automatic release?
Charles Owen is your bae.
You know what the word “shadbelly” means.
You rock the Sperries and boot socks look.
You posses the hunter butt.
Your polo must always be tucked in. Your belt loops must contain a belt.
A martingale just makes the look, regardless if your horse needs one or not.
Monograms. Everywhere. Saddle pad, polos, blankets, helmet, shirts, even your saddle plate.
You and your horse must match.
V-neck sweaters are your ideal way to be warm while riding.
A sale on RL Polo or Tailored Sportmans is like Christmas.
Your courses get so repetitive that your horse goes into sleep mode while riding.
A fancy horse is cute. A green horse is cute. A stud is cute.
Regardless of size, they are all ponies.
Thanks, Hunters of the world. But I’ll stick to show jumping.